All South African Kids of a certain age will remember that tune. To everyone else, when we were kids back in the "Old"(Apartheid) South Africa we were terribly short of TV programmes. I still have a mental block/negative attitude towards Tuesdays and Thursdays cos that was when the Afrikaans programmes were on. Anyway we used to have simulcast tv, basically when your show came on, you pulled out a radio and listened to the English dialogue on the radio while you watched on tv. Beverly Hills 90210, Melrose Place, I *THINK* 21 Jump Street too were like this, but so was an animated version of Spiderman. Yeah, it was one of the few shows on tv in one of the African Vernaculars, if I'm not mistaken I think it's SeSotho. Annnnnyhooo, the title of this blog's from there. Spidermaaaaan, Spidermaaaaan is Raboobee, Rabobeee. lol, God at least we've got satellite/cable now(everyone except me, this requires another blog called Dude, where's my DSTV) and one free to air non- state channel. Blaaaaahness, somehow I thought that'd be easier than having an obscure Milton-esque link with a topic like On her Weirdness. I digress, as per our usual agreement....
Like I've expounded in one of my previous posts, Ramadaan brings with it, added sleep stress to an already fatigued insomniac. So now that my pattern's pretty much screwed up, the other day I was staring at the ceiling and I head summing rustle. Not unusual because my window literally opens into a tree, see below:
So normal people would assume that it's trees moving about or birds or crickets or vampires or anything that should normally be out and about at night. Ok, now I realise this is confusing, ok cancel that. Now think back to BEFORE the rustling.
About a two weeks ago there was a biggish spider on my curtain(about 3-4cm across).Now, I'm not skrik(scared) of the buggers or anything that crawls(rodents I'm not too fond of, Rhodents I'm on good terms with ;p. And cats, can't stand the creatures.) So I left the spider in it's place, after all it wasn't doing anything to me. I figured it probably came in through the window, and so it shall find it's way out again. Spider was duly forgotten about, a few days later I see another one in the same vacinity. This one was smaller, but of the same species. Now I freaked out slightly cos I thought, what if husband and wife spidey were house-hunting along the tree branch. What if they popped into my room and decided the neighbourhood was good. I mean spiders living it up with a goth-type, perfect company. Then I was late for campus and didn't bother about it at all.
Now we get to the point above where I was lying in bed listening to rustles. Now I start thinking(in TYPICAL me fashion), what if the spiders are breeding here. What if the rustle is the kid's wedding, what if there's a sick spider party(I'm loathe to use the word orgy here cos I don't need to seem anymore deviant than I already am :)) happening. Do they KNOW what birth control is? Then I'm convinced I'm hearing things crawl on the walls. So I sit there and I wonder, if the first one was 3-4cm, roughly how big would Shelob be in relation to me if hobbits are remarkably smaller than us? DO I HAVE SHELOB IN MY ROOM???!!! OMGOMGOMGOMG!!! Sooooo, now the rustling is getting louder. I would make such a great horror-film director. Another topic though. I'm now tempted to switch on my lights, but I was 1) too lazy and 2) the light switch was near the sighting zone. And if the little spideywideys don't know my hand's going into "their" territory and bite me, Lord knows what will happen, cos I have an allergen count of 714(I kid you not, normal people are 0-25, 27 is abnormal so yeah...say it loud FREEEEEEEEEEAKAZOID).
Instead I sit in bed, take my cell phone and press menu button repeatedly, in order to generate some light. And I'm scouring the walls with this light. And suddenly I hear Galadriel's(Cate Blanchett's) voice saying "And for you Frodo Baggins, I give to you our brightest star, Earendil, it will guide you in your darkest hour and strike fear in the hearts' of your enemies, use it wisely...."(or summing like that)....
It took me a good 10 minutes before I realised I was NOT in Middle Earth aka World of Arda aka Ea. Neither was I Frodo Baggins. Neither was my phone the Phial filled with the Light of Earendil. Neither was my room Shelob's Lair at Cirith Ungol (Cirith is height or steps or pass summing to that effect and Ungol is Spider in the Lotr lingos<-- your arb fact of the day sponsored by moi).
I dunno whether it's the lack of sleep or have I finally tipped over the edge?
"I'm sure you must be weary, dear, with soaring up so high;
Will you rest upon my little bed?" said the Spider to the Fly.
"There are pretty curtains drawn around; the sheets are fine and thin,
And if you like to rest awhile, I'll snugly tuck you in!"
Oh no, no," said the little Fly, "for I've often heard it said,
They never, never wake again, who sleep upon your bed!"
^^^ Remember that? Mary Howitt wrote that in 18someodd 30-ish I think *googles* 1829 to be exact. The Poem the Spider and the Fly.
Les araignées sont partout
they're coming...
rah*
