Said Sadly**

Bill died.

May he find the peace his body wouldn't give him. May his family and loved ones continue to feel blessed for having his strength as an example to guide them.

Death is only the beginning,
rah*

**Smashing Pumpkins, vocals James Iha and Nina Gordon

Ignorance Kills**

I met a wonderful man this past weekend.

Well not, met met. I came across his blog at LiveJournal. And connected to him through his words.

Bill writes in the most extraordinary way, his deviantArt gallery is scintillatingly beautiful to read.

Bill is also dying.

(as are we all).

Bill has brain cancer and Aids.


Oh boy, aren't you happyhappy you're a perfectly placed shiny, little button on Tannie's superbly tailored, crimpolene rokkie*** now?

Bill doesn't ask anyone for sympathy and words are his therapy. Bill also seems to be ecstatically happy with the love of his life, his boyfriend Brody. Yes, Bill's gay, get over it.

And that's where things get complicated. I've been raving on and on about this guy's writing, but why is it that people cannot see beyond the gayness? Why is it that they can only accept that his writing is worthy of merit when I say that between his double whammy of illnesses he managed to punt the Gaza cause, which is an issue close the hearts of most of the people I've spoken about Bill to? Is the fact that he can care about one of "ours" the only reason he is worth his weight as a human being and in turn worthy of our prayers? That's just extreme selfishness and self absorption. Another sickening trend I've noticed is that people can have a so what attitude about his illnesses, as though he deserves it BECAUSE he is gay.

I cannot accept this. How many heterosexual people could handle the idea of having both Aids and brain cancer? Who are you to judge him as a human being based on his sexual orientation? Not only gay people get Aids, anyone and everyone can. Surely judging is God's realm? So what if his illnesses are his "punishment"? If Bill is gay, how does that diminish from his suffering? How convinced are you that you won't be punished, with all your self righteous flaming heterosexuality, on the other side?

The point of this post is: God is not the monopoly of a select few. There is only one God, and He belongs to everyone. This same one God created Muslims, Jews, Christians,Hindus, Agnostics, Wiccans (lulz, inside joke here for Lily), black people, white people, in between reticulant-ish coloured people, and accountants. He created us all, with the same amount of dedication, care and love.Who are we to deny showing love, care and compassion to others of God's creation too?

Read his posts about Brody, who in my opinion seems like an equally remarkable human being, he looks after Bill and now that Bill is really sick, blogs for him too. How many people can claim to have been loved to that extent, straight or gay or asexual? Lust aside, is the love that they share, not the same human love and affection that every person on earth desires?

I don't see why people find the need to judge other people when they have not one smidgeon of understanding of what a person must be going through. I'm not sure I want such judgemental people in my life and my world. I wish the blinkers were removed before they ran their race.

Millions of people will stand on Arafat and ask for forgiveness in a few hours. I hope someone's prayer for us to retrace our roots and return to our divinely ordained path as a people with educated, open minds who think before we blab, people who know that to judge is not what our religion teaches us, is answered.

We are not alone in this world, we are representatives of our religion, behaving like bigots only reinforces stereotypes of barbarism. And we know were saved from that.


Edna Ferber, author of So Big (read the book!...or watch the movie, with Bette Davis (I'm a major movie geek, TCM is quality viewing)) once famously said, "A closed mind is a dying mind." Think about that. Use the minds you've been given.

Despite all my rage, I'm still just a rat in a cage.
rah*

**Alternative post title was Bill's to Pay.
*** rokkie= Afrikaans, diminutive form for dress, ie little dress.Tannie= Aunt

Immutable

Expression is wasted sometimes. I want this:

The Smashing Pumpkins- Stand Inside Your Love

Comments may be sent to me privately via teh_interwebz queenLestat[at]gmail[dawt].com should you feel the need.I will respond.Promise :P

"Recast as child and mystic sage",
rah*

Why?! The VERY idea...

Scully: "Have you ever entertained the idea of trying to find life on this planet?"

Mulder: "I have seen the life on this planet, Scully, and that is exactly why I am looking elsewhere."

From The X-Files

Pretty much sums me up . The Mulder part that is. Human beings are an awful species.Really are quite disgusting and base. I, however, am part Vampyre, part Elven...sooooo... stfu?

Blaaaaahnians have landed :/
rah*

It's the fiiiiiiii-nal countdown

Tonight, Tonight... that's all I have to wait for Zeitgeist.

I hope this is as huge as I think it is. Tarantula is good, but I don't think there will ever be another Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness or another Machina again.

Billy was not the band.Their combined efforts made them what they were. Fuck you D'arcy and and James. For being total asses. And fuck you Billy, for being a self righteous prig. Anyways half the band's new, the name's old, hope the sound (and more importantly the lyrics) stays so too; and true to who they were and what they represented,

"For this heart's
A little bit older
Try to hold on
To this love aloud
And we are still alive
Try to hold on
And we have survived
Try to hold on
And no one should deny
We tried to hold onto the pulse of the feedback current
Into the flow of encrypted movement
Slapback kills the ancient remnants
That try to hold on
Try to hold on
To this heart alive
Try to hold on
To this love aloud
Try to hold on
And we are still alive
Try to hold on
And we have survived
Try to hold on
Pop tart
You never listen..."

Holding Thumbs
rah*

I AM...

...one of those weird Japanese manga-style horror movies, sans subtitles....
No one really gets the point of it all, but everyone still recommends you watch it.

*sighness*
rah*




Oh PS and to the fucktard army, before you start,I do watch those movies.For your purposes substitute Bollywood Sudden Song and Dance Sequences out of nowhere for Japanese.

*credits to Wesley for the title in it's original form, and to Nicky and Nick who saved the Shire with me :)

Inflation

1x pair of Doc Martens somewhere around 1996 or before...R300-350ish

December 2006...they die whilst not in my direct possession.

1 x (last) pair of Doc Martens(tagged with the sign of the beast) June 2007 from some obscure charo shop... R200

(I kid you not, that was the price. Thanks to some weird high paying, very easy,very last minute editing job, (which I didn't think counted as "work", therefore considered it freebie money)I only had to throw in R200 which is R100 less than 10 years ago.)(Okay, my logic might be a bit weird there but it makes sense to me)

...Being rawking enough to still wear them...

....priceless.

\m/

For everyone else there's pointy Nine West Stiletto boots
(but not for,)
rah*


PS breaking them in again is a bitch...

Pensées de le Esprit

لَا الشَّمْسُ يَنبَغِي لَهَا أَن تُدْرِكَ الْقَمَرَ وَلَا اللَّيْلُ سَابِقُ النَّهَارِ وَكُلٌّ فِي
فَلَكٍ يَسْبَحُونَ

"It is not for the sun to overtake the moon, nor does the night outstrip the day. They all float, each in an orbit."
Holy Qur'aan Surah Yaseen, Ayah 40 (Chapter 41, Verse 40)

Now I'm no great Islamic Scholar or Tafseer expert, but this particular verse always reminds me that there is a time and place for all things in life. Everything happens within it's own cycles as is meant to be. The world is a vast and complex space, despite the chaos humans create, there is a natural order and a logic which we will never understand.

The world and life as we know it is a miracle and a beauty. And I think that as human beings we tend to be so caught up in our own pettiness that we ignore the little things and our own insignificance in terms of the larger whole. Sometimes we might think we're on the wrong road or we've taken the longer route and wonder what if we'd turned right at the intersection instead of left. But that is because we're human and I doubt we ever truely know why we are where we are and for what reason.

I'm not too much of a fatalist, because I do believe that although there are some things which are destined to be, we do have a large hand in giving our destiny a kick start. You know, every time I hear the word ''destiny'' I see that pained, mock serious look on Brandon Flowers's face. That's beside the point, anyways, I really do feel that we are nothings merely part of the machinery of the universe, cogs in the wheel of life if you will. And we should appreciate where we are now and what we have because we are lucky enough to have a God out there who is Most Merciful.

Just a random thought which I had, thought I'd put it out to the jury since I'm not much of an autocrat.


WanderingWonderer
rah*

Disclaimer
PS I know I'm probably going to get another lot of emails from various self righteous and parasitic imbeciles commenting on the nature of my previous post and now on this one, so I put the disclaimer out now and say please get a life. Some of us are real human beings (though judging by the species we'd much rather be elves or vampires).