While it's still newsworthy

I know this whack job of a person. For years she's been blaming the decline of society on the fact that Muslim youth "follow" "Shaytaans" like Michael Jackson who is the very symbol of all that is wrong with the world.

I usually want to point out, when she's on one of these tangents, that he's not been that popular music wise for a good few years, but qL holds her peace and lets the woman rant. (Needless to say, that for the said person Bollywood is considered as relatively less decadent and immoral than mainstream Western pop because clearly the logic that that's based on is very sound reasoning somehow...)

On his death she says: "Shame, mashaAllah, must've been a good man, he got to go on Jummeraat..."

qL just goes -_- *facepalm*

Talk about hypocrisy eh?

I had a whole lot of quips I was coming up with while there were still unconfirmed reports of the death of MJ. Things like (to the tune of Billie Jean) Michael Jackson is NOT A-LIVE, (to the tune of Black or White) It don't matter if you're dead or alive....yeah it was nearly 1 am, I was freezing after the confeds cup semis with Bafana vs Brazil and stuck in traffic...lameness was to be expected.

I see blaaaaahnians,
rah*

Brace Yourselves

It seems as though I've weaned myself off the glorious medicinal haze induced by Mybulin cocktails, but who said drugs weren't a fruitful means to inspiration.

To clarify, picture the setting. An errant wisdom tooth, a slightly misaligned jaw bone, a nerve being compressed, random flashes of deafness and blindness. And then you find yourself in the orthodontist's chair discussing orthognathic surgery. A week later you find yourself in braces to stabilise your teeth and to keep them in place while your jaw is being shifted around and you experiencing the most excruciating pain you've ever known.

You look like Betty Suarez and feel like Angel Face after his round with Tyler. All this while your jaws are also uncomfortably suspended by dental cement.The cement keeps your teeth apart but hey, who needs to chew for 8 weeks when there's a million ways to eat and reinvent custard, jelly and mashed potatoes?

Anyway, like Dylan Thomas, I do have coherent moments between my drugged out fogs. One of which was staring me in the face all along.

Mr Zuma's legal woes are not over yet. The concept of stepping down because your integrity and ethical quality is tainted obviously does not apply in South Africa. And think of the legal costs of these battles of his. Fighting to get yourself into court, then fighting to get yourself out of court and then the whole appeal process as well.

Election posters proudly display our new ethically tainted (but that's okay because apparently, "we don't want sophistication" as South Africans) president in waiting Bra Jakes. The man is quite charismatic when you see him perform on stage, I'll give him that much credit, but he looks kinda slimy in the election posters. There's something about him that reminds me of Mr Toad of Toad Hall. For a lack of a better picture of the election posters here's a bit of a taste:



Now this got me thinking, imagine in addition to his legal fees, what would his dental fees be like? I suspect (based on the pictures on the posters) that he's got a bit of an open bite/cross bite and would probably be regarded in orthodontics as a Class II/III Malocclusion. I would assume the total cost of his orthodontic work would total another R30 000+. Blaaaaah.

JZ's over 60 so orthodontic support might not be the best option for him because of decreased bone density and teeth strength. The only other option would be porcelain or ceramic crowns and veneers (like those on 10 Years Younger and Extreme Makeover) to fix the gaps cost easily upward of R1600 per tooth! Most cosmetic dentists would prefer doing each tooth so as to create a more natural look and a more even smile. And at 32 teeth per human we're looking at (with the usual cost of labourlabourlabour)a minimum of R51200!


I'm no accountant but I have a feeling, our president's going to be a financial burden on us. Oh but wait, Sheikh's out, he can now go to the dentist, orthodontist,prostodontist, send his wives and kids for hair cuts and have his cars washed too.

On the plus side however, Julius Maleblaaaaah's got perfect teeth. All hail Caesar?!

Right now I'm sure JZ's reading this and thinking:

yours queen_Lestat, _|_ yours...


Glad I could provide such enlightening information and be of use to you all,
rah*

Dickens had it down;

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to heaven, we were all going direct the other way - in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only."

(And this is where I make my apologies, because 1) I'm too lazy to go find my copy of A Tale of Two Cities and 2)I've got too many things running to Google, therefore please accept my apologies if the quote's a bit ad libbed)

I was thinking this quote sums up our current political clime quite succinctly. Our teenage years are proving to be quite challenging, but I still have hope that sense will prevail after this weekend. Lekota is no fool, and he probably has big business behind him all the way. In fact he might've been a candidate for the presidential race in Polokwane last year, but that Stellenbosch winery incident might not've worked in his favour. It is because of him that government put in place that declare all business interests clause into place, however that rule obviously does not extend to the Zuma and Malema camp, because they just use politics to get ahead of the law.

What many people don't seem to realise is that the last time there was this much internal strife and politics within the ANC, the PAC was birthed. The PAC was a credible political organisation for many years before the ANC became the "brand" of liberation rhetoric.Granted though, the PAC did have a more militant angle, however it was with utter shockhorrorawe that I was reminded of their history, when Pheko went up to congratulate our new president on his nomination and asked for the release of former APLA cadres still rotting away in SA jails. Next post, I think I'll treat whoever reads this to a summative history of the formation of the PAC and few interesting political tidbits like the Sobukwe Clause.

I find this utterly appalling, regardless of their political divisions and ideologies, MK and APLA were quite the same bunch of revolutionaries and fought for exactly the same things. Why are they still in jail? The TRC denied APLA amnesty on the grounds that the PAC would not release their real names and was submitting code names. The TRC was also running at a very delicate time in the restructuring of our judicial bases and so the PAC had a reason to withold names because how would they know how much their actions and intelligence might have been compromised. And now the ANC conveniently declares that the PAC forgot to fill in the presidential pardon forms. What I find strange is how any party would do that and not get their members out? Pheko made it quite clear that he hopes Motlanthe would take action on the matter and get them out.

But shame, the PAC's internal squabbles have all but annihilated them, and then the final straw was when we had one of our ridiculous floor crossing debacles and Patricia de Lille walked away with their seat, and formed her own party. Essentially giving a party who no one had ever voted for, a party with no real policy ideology (besides being opposed to the ANC), and a party wholly spun around the personality of that firebrand De Lille. In fact the PAC degenerated to such a state that when given their 2 or 3 minutes of tv canvassing time, they announced that we should "not vote for them this election, they'll be ready for the next one". That is political meh-ness of note. However, we should not forget that parties who had a strong following in the liberation years still exist the PAC is still alive, as is AZAPO, UDM and SOPA. Many of these parties still have their old guard intellectual members, whereas the ANC has moved from the intellectuals to the MK lot and the sort who find Malema non-offensive.

Should Lekota form his own party, and hypothetically take away 20% of the current ANC fan base, they'd still be left with a 40% (of the current 60% majority they hold). The largest opposition party is that bag of whingers (the DA) and they have what? 12% of a stake? In countries like the US and the UK the power balance shifts between 2 parties at about roughly 48-52% of a swing vote with the minor parties raking in a few points here and there. I do not think the policy practices of a two party state are healthy or very democratic, but in South Africa, we're new to this voting business and we should turn out at the polls en masse and have a right to vote for any party we choose. My problem is, with a 60% majority and the next biggest party holding 12% to form the opposition- what kind of democracy do we have?


Another lol, yet worrisome thing is that at the voting after the nominations were given, 40 out of 400 ballot sheets were spoilt. HOW?! There were two names on the list, how can you not tick or cross between the lines properly? And you're in parliament, in charge of all of us and you have no efficiency in even ticking or crossing according to instructions?


Interesting times we live in, and someday when they make the movie of the Fall of Thabo and the Rise of Zuma, I am almost certain this is going to be on the OST.



Coldplay- Viva la Vida. Think about this one.

Enjoy!
rah*

PS For the bandwidth challenged , see if you find this song as applicable to our situation as I do :)

Opportunism Is:

South African Cabinet Ministers.

Cabinet is appointed by a president. S/He appoints ministers to various portfolios, these are not guaranteed or elected by public posts.

Ministers with a spine, tendered their resignation not really in solidarity with Oom Thabo, but rather because their "contract" is effectively over with the exit of a president. Gripe of the post: Ministers of the like of Manto Tshabalala Msimang.

This woman, enjoys the dubious honour of widespread unpopularity.However, despite her garlic-lemon-olive oil brand of treatment of terminally ill patients, she enjoyed a free reign and total support from Oom Thabo. Some quarters even go so far as considering his support and loyalty to her part of his demise. However, at crunch time, when the President is "recalled", does she hand in her resignation? No.

Being a Minister is not a right, it's a privileged office which is supposed to allow you to put your skills at work for the betterment of the people. Evidently for Ministers such as Dr Beetroot, putting your own position of power, your pension is far more important than having a spine or showing some loyalty to the man who put his career in jeopardy for you to continue running amok. This critique doesn't only apply to her, but to all of those who kept their cushy jobs despite the fact that they might not be deployed back to cabinet under Motlanthe. Shakespeare needs to be paraphrased at times like this, something is very much rotten in the State of South Africa. It is precisely this kind of complacent behaviour which has filtered down from the top that has resulted in our all round poor service delivery for us plebs at the bottom of the gravy train.

In other news, I was utterly appalled to be faced with the shocking reminder of APLA cadres still incarcerated (more on that in another post). This was quite strange, because I was thinking about them over the weekend as I ran through my voting options.


Right, now I await the list of who will serve under Motlanthe, whom I hope will begin work as though he is a proper president and not merely a stop over. Congratulations Mr President. I hope your wisdom, diplomacy and work ethic supercedes your ambition.

So help us God,
rah*

Armchair Politics

My 8 year old of the next generation, somewhat displaced and extended holder of shared genetic-material found an errant abaya the other day and wore it; at first pretending she was a judge by sitting at the dining room table and pointing fingers at everyone and handing out sentences. Then she decided to be a part of some imaginary graduation ceremony and the abaya became her academic gown. Needless to say these non-fun situations soon passed and she found much more entertainment pretending to be Count Dracula (I did mention she was related to me, didn't I?) and then running up and down the passage singing the Darkwing Duck theme song with her "cape" flying behind her.She was warned about the dangers of being irresponsible and reckless. Yes, she did trip and fall and get hurt. And went back to being a Judge.

She is 8, she stopped and understood the meaning of reckless behaviour. Apparently it is quite a difficult concept to grasp. My gripe for the post: Julius Malema.

Not only is he well over 8 years old, but I find it very hard to believe how this uneducated moron can be considered "youth". Fikile whatshisface was about 45 and president of the Youth League, but hell, when did a few decades make any difference to semantics. I would venture to suggest that perhaps the immaturity of his statements qualifies him as Nduna of the masses. Statements along the lines of killing for Zuma (and then wondering how anyone else could possibly find his statement offensive?), let us not forget the latest one of how the media should stop focussing on the arms deal now, because in his esteemed opinion "it's old news and it's gone boring now".Need I point out that it was PRECISELY The Arms Deal which got us into our current predicament anyway? Does no one ever LISTEN to the utter rubbish that comes out of his mouth?

I find the hypocrisy way too blatant. This big mouthed, small brained, skivvy has proven to us that the ANC cannot rein him in (as Mr Harvester has pointed out). But that is besides the point, his antics at the ANCYL elections did more to publicise his ineptitude as a leader than his statements ever will.

This is the man who demands JZ is president, for the sake of the "poor". However, at tax payers expense him and his cronies have what seemed like a drunken brawl and threw around beverages such as R8/ 500ml bottled water? All in the name of the poor in SA, some of whom in the rural areas do not have taps or running water. But yes, that total waste of tax payers money was not enough. No sir. ANCYL top brass, probably including this fuckwit, needed to drop their trousers in protest over some policy or the other and give journalists present a shot of their nekkid butts. Which as some of you might recall, made front page of The Times the next day.

If that is the type of shamless behaviour he condones and considers appropriate on winning an election, then I think I speak for all of us when I say that this dude might just be the undoing of SA. It was the Marquis de Sade who said, "One is never so dangerous when one has no shame, than when one has grown too old to blush". And that is exactly the mentality of the ANCYL leadership headed by this "counter revolutionary" character. I agree with The Organharvester, regardless of what Thabo's done or how aloof or arrogant he is or was, this jackass has no right to humiliate him and should have a basic sense of respect for the man.


Trying times for SA indeed, but this has been perhaps the most fascinating political week since 1994. And I'll be damned if I let Malema (split that into it's Latin and Greek components and you get Mal or Male- wrong, evil, bad (Latin) such as that in Malleus Maleficarum, Ema or Eme is from the Greek meaning to vomit, I think the word emit probably takes its root from here...Shall we play spot the irony?) have his say without throwing in mine.

Aaaah bleh, I'm out of time now. When I return, more on the Ministers and their resignations and Motlanthe.

BRB (I mean it this time)
rah*

Once Upon a Time

A young queen_Lestat woke up to a very rainy, as is tradition, 7th Birthday. The dashing prince Kurt Cobain was still alive in those days, much to the delight of many. However, as qL opened her eyes, she noticed a little package on the side of her pillow. Suddenly, it dawned upon her that it was her birthday and that this was not a dream.

qL smiled with glee as she opened the package to find a box set of the most beautiful looking books she had ever seen. And she had seen a lot of books by that age already. The books soon came to be her favourites, because it was still a good three years before the Royal Family of Weird and the Defenders of Against the Onslaught of the Blaaaaahnians, were to present her with the treasured family heirloom, also known as The Lord of the Rings box set. The books she was presented with on this fateful day was none other than the complete works of a certain Beatrix Potter.

Beatrix Potter revolutionised the concept of children's books and literature, was a keen business woman and an independent individual who fought against every possible form of social barriers to make a name for herself as one of the most influential writers of her age.She contributed to hundreds of children reading books, by making her books child friendly, self illustrated and non threatening/intimidating to children.




Happy Birthday Beatrix Potter (28 July 1866-1943), wherever you may be, from every single child* who found joy and comfort in Peter Rabbit, Flopsy, Mopsy, Cotton-tail, Squirrel Nutkin, Jemima Duck, and Little Pig Robinson.

*rah

To whoever gets that sign-off : ;)

Lighters for anyone?

April 8 1994. The body of rock icon and the face which defined a generation was found dead. RIP Kurt Cobain. *Lights a lighter for a moment*. I have a knack for remembering dates oui? He actually died on the 4th or 5th April, but I had no time to pay my respects then. However, that wasn't really what this post was supposed to be on.

I've had this extract going in and around the revolving glass doors of my mind for a while now, and wanted to share it with whoever reads the stuff I pin up here.

"When people are happy they have a reserve, she had told Elizabeth, upon which to draw, whereas she was like a wheel without a tyre (she was fond of such metaphors), jolted by every pebble -- so she would say, staying on after the lesson, standing by the fire-place with her bag of books, her ‘satchel’, she called it, on a Tuesday morning, after the lesson was over. And she talked too about the war. After all, there were people who did not think the English invariably right. There were books. There were meetings. There were other points of view. Would Elizabeth like to come with her to So-and-so? (a most extraordinary-looking old man). Then Miss Kilman took her to some church in Kensington and they had tea with a clergyman. She had lent her books. Law, medicine, politics, all professions are open to women of your generation, said Miss Kilman. But for herself, her career was absolutely ruined, and was it her fault? Good gracious, said Elizabeth, no.

And her mother would come calling to say that a hamper had come from Bourton and would Miss Kilman like some flowers? To Miss Kilman she was always very, very nice, but Miss Kilman squashed the flowers all in a bunch, and hadn’t any small talk, and what interested Miss Kilman bored her mother, and Miss Kilman and she were terrible together; and Miss Kilman swelled and looked very plain, but Miss Kilman was frightfully clever. Elizabeth had never thought about the poor. They lived with everything they wanted, -- her mother had breakfast in bed every day; Lucy carried it up; and she liked old women because they were Duchesses, and being descended from some Lord."

Virginia Woolf in Mrs Dalloway

Mrs Dalloway was published in 1925 and is written in the stream of consciousness style of Virginia Woolf and the High Modernists. The story basically follows a day in the life of a Mrs Dalloway who is preparing to be hostess to the Prime Minister and centres around her thoughts as she goes about her daily chores and getting the house in order for the arrival of the Prime Minister. Mrs Dalloway also formed the basis of the storyline for the book and the movie The Hours.

This passage often makes me wonder, just how far has society and social consciousness come since 1925? Women still have their own opinions, and each age thinks that the women of their age have more rights than those of the age before? Do people think about the poor any more now than they did before? Or does it not matter as long as we have what we want? Are people expedient? Does caring for your fellow members of society only extend as far as what you can get out of them?

I still do maintain that Kurt Cobain was the Virginia Woolf of our generation, both gifted artists, both tortured and both with a keen misanthropic streak. After all, if you're not a Vampire or and Elve, you never will see what a despicable race the human tribe is.

I'm going off To the Lighthouse
rah*

I R teh_rememberz!!

So yeah about that last post...

Well I remembered the arb thought I had before I wanted to post that thought and then forgot it and then posted on my forgetting instead.

A combination of an old Organ Harvester post (Note: old post in Organ Harvesterish is about 2 weeks or so ago)and the whole Irvin 'K'hoza debacle brought back the memory of the original thought I had. And so here it is.

A few weeks back I was flipping through channels because (yeah, I'll admit it) I was looking for Gilmore Girls reruns. (And not a word shall be uttered about this after this ever again.)(I happen to think that show has/had the best dialogue on tv.)(Excessive bracket use for no apparent reason is copyright and trademark blah blah blah to The Chronicles.)(Thought I'd shove my stylistic disclaimer in there, three years down the line.)

So back to my point, this advert comes up for this new show (dunno if it's new or old, my tv habits don't go much beyond Gilmore Girls and The X Files reruns when I'm really in the mood to watch a show, or the over dramatization and exaggerated acting styles of the mid-life-crisis-drop-out-of-work-and-take-up-night-school-acting-and
-drama-classes- students-who-find-bit-parts-portraying-historical-figures-for-
The-History-Channel-documentaries-but-acting-in-a-style-which-makes-me
-wonder-if-they-really-think-they're-in-a-major-cinematic-epic-thingy.)

The show portrays this mainly Black suburb/town in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina and this town is plagued by crime, violence, corrupt cops, gangsterism, drugs etc on top of the burden of homelessness and displaced citizens. And the few good cops are struggling to make arrests and have safety and order because none of the locals will co-operate or provide information on the criminals in their midst. Now for my point.

I watched the advert and then when the name came up of the show immediately went all zOMG! And then told the nearest sibling "Damn, you know, you know you're South African when your first thought after seeing an advert for a show about a community/theme like that is "RASCISTS! How can they call a town where black people live that and still name a show that and then ADVERTISE on SOUTH AFRICAN TV...""

Yep, people, you guessed it, the show's name is ...

K-Ville.


Shall we play some spot the irony?
rah*

Patriotism is...

me.

zOMG!

I cannot sleep because I am worrying about the ANC Polokwane conference thing. No, really. Despite my usual insomnia, my eyes cannot close and neither can I stop thinking about the possibilities of the outcome.

zOMG!

I mean what if Zuma wins? Will showering join beetroot and garlic and olive oil and lemon juice in our National First Aid Kit? What if Thabo wins? Will he cling to power and become Mugabe II? Well garlic and lemon juice concoction will still be available on the chronic medication list anyway. *shrivels into foetal position*

zOMG!

Lawdeh, I'm blogging about this *clutches duvet*. Talk about g33k!n355.I don't want to get into the ins and outs and of why we shouldn't panic. Because that would be hypocrisy at it's best. Personally, I think they're both a bit Blaaaaah and I wish we had one of those head to head presidential candidate debates like they do in the States.

zOMG!

I don't know whether the tone of what I am writing here is revealing the SHEER AMOUNT OF PANIC I feel. I think I am mad. Really.

zOMG!

I have this feeling of panic...like I quit smoking, imbibed a litre of coffee-neat and then went to OD on 3ph3dr4**. teh_panic! Consternation is not a good noun...sounds too fuddy duddy to reflect TEH_PANIC!!!

zOMG!

AAAAAAAAAAAAarrrrrrrrggh!!!

zOMG!

I hope it all works out, I need sleep. I can only imagine how Zuma and Thabo feel...I wonder if they have sleepless nights worrying about the state of the country and it's people like I have.

Nkosi Sikele i Afrika...we need it.
*counting sheep*

rah*

**please translate on your own- 3= e and 4=A. Don't need any more spam through Google searches than I already have :)

Remember,Remember...

I am usually one of the first people to warn against the dangers of reductionist theories when it comes to history.

But...

To all the rebels,the idealists, the believers in the mantra of: what we sow today we reap tomorrow,the anarchists, the ones who are willing to fight for your causes without fear. To anyone who thinks our days of fighting for freedom are over(and to those who believe they're not),to anyone who is willing to sacrifice themselves to make a difference.

To anyone who believes in the power of the greater good of the people outweighing the corruption and oppression of governments the world over.To anyone who believes in the importance of the freedom and independance of the media. To all those who believe that they contribute to educating people about the importance of all of the above.To anyone with an ounce of Romanticism and poetic depth left about their souls,





Happy Guy Fawkes to all of you!

She who advocates anarchy without violence
rah*

The Eagles (Almost Wouldn't) Have Landed

This day in History:

4 July 1776

America gets it's independence from Britain after a bloody revolution.I think it was one of the last battles/wars ever fought on American soil.America has gone to war in other countries though, but never really had a battle in their own backyard ever since.

However, on this day, the King of England at the time, one of the Georges (III probably because George V kicked it in the 20th century and IV would've probably have been too young). Anyways the George King (III?) wrote the following in his diary as his entry for the day, on this very day that America was proclaimed independent:

"Nothing important happened today".

I think his son replaced him on the throne because he later went insane. Go figure...

Thought I'd share that
rah*

PS got the America's funniest home videos theme song stuck in my head now for some reason.